[ Original ] irregular point Red Series - Southern

text / Xing


Hotel
standing tall French window, pink pajamas, disheveled cilia, fingers curl of cigarettes, and never face the kind of lesson, have made me feel melancholy and tragic closure hysterical. To Shenzhen 5 years, I fell in love with the metropolis, but a deep nauseate with the city, and morrow, I'll leave it all good and wrong, from the quondam, dust floating in the air of this world. I turned back to the chamber, his body curled up in the great sofa, blurred eyes and tears, but in the graceful thoughts diffusion, diffusion. -
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I just leave the school full of want, from the base of my heart hate the strict stereotypes of life, the kin opened up for me yet, I focus directly into the city to educate high school internship, how it all envy, and me, but defected in questing a policy. I know my share of strong bones will one day riot and devastate my pride, but I still threw the alternative, and in the moment of leaving home, my mother's tears of despair, dad furious screamed in my mind freeze into eternity. I hauled his unruly simple luggage goes back to the train, I secretly said to myself, I must live well! -
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on the practice, I met Wei, south, like me nightmare of a lad, nearly the same age and we talk approximately the pursuit of a very speculative. Wei tall slender face British Gas, you tin begin a child-like innocence into my smile, cheerful asset he said, will be amused to dancing, so I have infected his mind, accompanied him happy. Us stop in Guangzhou, where he would go over his friend. I said I dream in Shenzhen, where I'm going to work hard globe, he suddenly pulled my hand, shook straining and unlock is still to start cozy smile said to me: Win!
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good work and do not expect to find, in my aimless wandering for a few days later, I decided to take the initiative, so I bought a weekly to gather all of the recruitment advertising, straight sale their own home. Unfortunately, I still run into a wall again and again, both the face of a critical eye, I secondhand some self-confidence is a little disappeared. I can not help a bit sad from the heart,GHD Straighteners NZ, do yourself to really needless? Depression and panic did not let me back, I still clothed according to people every day in each company's personnel department, despite the more times I face is rejected. -
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After a few hundred times
after the failure, I finally found a coupler venture company materials in her work, daily shuttle among the station and bus station, way the latest distribution of the material. Bitter, tired, but I console myself, Shenzhen finally approved me, however not very lukewarm. As the day ran out, I am well past tender rind becomes rowdy, I began to hate the job, so I'm still nigh to watch out for anyone extra for me. I run approximately for 2 months after the successful jump ship to another company to do one advertising designer. Proctor face critical eye, I took the composure of the exam to design a peerless conception of the ads. Rate that would be, I caught the eyes flashing surprise examiners. So I was hired. Advertising design, I have a solitary vantage, from small school of drawing, my creativity will always get high marks, and this is apparently nearby work done. -
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Shenzhen namely a area at the strength, if you have the ability, here namely your paradise, I think so. After half a annual in my work, I designed several very successful principally ads up apt hundred percentage customer satisfaction, the corporation I was enhanced apt advertising adviser of the Department of Design. In those days, particularly the commerce, our advertising department go until late every daytime, I was tireless sit by the microprocessor one daytime, tired, dazed. Personnel Manager Yang to give me a day off let me recess, I resolved refuse, this tense moment, I better take the day off. Until the day of the consecutive fighting the morning ready to obtain up to eat, I suddenly a dark eyes, collapsed to the floor. When I woke up, I was lying in the hospital, is the 1st to come to the momentary Manager Yang perturbed face, discern I woke up, he eagerly inquired me how are you consciousness, I laughed at him, I'm nice. Then he suddenly fly into a rage: Managers also felt his gaffe, perplexed expression above his face, saw into my eyes, apparently there is different entity in flash. -
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at the mighty request of the personnel manager, I leave three days rest the body. I stay in a small rented house, boring it was hard to annihilate, I go to slumber but slumber, the manager shrieked and asked me a nice point of care was not, I am grateful, he said, by the way came to see me later work, eyes and flashed his eyes in the hospital the day the perplexing material, the center does not know how, and chug the bound. In the p.m., Yang came to holding a bouquet of chromatic roses, I took the rose that moment, a variety of feeling dizzy, even standing in the doorway seeing Yang blankly, until he moving their faces to my eyes, I peruse from his eyes someone of namely complexity, the desire was actually undressed! Ring with his hand on my waist, I want to damage free yet unable to pluck away, his fanatical kissed me, I felt like I was a tiny bit of melt and evaporate. That night, he was his best in me agreeable, stroking his flat back my tears, murmured:
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risky my love, I have indulged themselves unable to help themselves by surprise. Yang is a great savor of the man, but he Gongsifenming, in the company, he would not revealed the trace of my feelings, but every time after work, he is like a assorted man, eager, earnest, crazy! I obsessed with him, and Chilian him, even in the company, my eyes linger on him only, he said that I more than once, let me memorandum that the attitudes of others, do not headlong declare our feelings to others, or others would say I use his power. But I but could not control himself, and soon to see my colleagues are not normal, but Yang and performance so normal, inverted picture is my unrequited love of the. To this end I am wronged, it is that he fights a few times, but he refused to compromise, the company is still nothing had happened to me, the company's words can almost make me struggling to cope with, almost all people know I'm Yang in the unrequited love manager, that strange look oppresses me self-esteem, in their outlook, beautiful teeth I have restless heart, want to take shortcuts in their vocations. I work so hard with, but not in a commendable attention. Love makes me feel tired, Yang has been disinclined to face our love avoid blindly in front of people, made me feel like a miserable clown. -
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At this time, I suddenly discovered I was pregnant! I hastily called ecstasy Yang, with the end of the line dreadful quiet, my heart a little bit chilly. I took leave of want with the company, hiding in his small room to Yang desperately call the activity again and again, and again refused to reply, and finally totally off the machine, I lost phone lying on the mattress crying was killing a liver and gallbladder, I do not know why he did this to me, are all gentle, all touching is false? As I had four days off for four years, alarm, ache, despair, helplessness! -
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When I returned to the company again when my colleagues told me that Yang quit unexpectedly! I suddenly pale, sat in the desk at a detriment,GHD Purple Straighteners, efforts to arrange out the confusion of thoughts. Liu colleagues conspire to me and odd to me: After listening to her, I almost fainted, I grabbed her arm gaffe asked her: Hand rubbing arm and said: out of the company, like a ray of specter aimless roaming in the avenue. Silent tears on the face of diffuse ascend, the heart aches it really aches. -
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not remember how long their wandering in the end, people coming and going on the street looked at me with curiosity, I suddenly explode of nausea, vomiting, flew up on the roadside flower bed, the woman back the gentle words came: I met the boy on the train. Apparently surprised the other side, staring at me amazing. At that time I really can not tell what you are feeling, just wait for them to find a way to stitch drilling, so embarrassing situations encountered an acquaintance, can not dream the kind of mortification. They insisted on bringing me home in my rented house, Wei's girlfriend gave me individually a ruddy tarn piglet egg, while Wei has again asked me this year how to off the face of a friend concern, in my mind of the wronged accompanied by tears that overran out, see me cry, and Wei Wei's girlfriend to solace me a rush, like to see the family-like, I put my heart fall into all of the grievances complained against them, After listening to silence Wei, and finally he said:
heard him mention this, my eyes, panic, terror, feeling of heart bombards. -
Lan Zhao Wei's girlfriend
my shoulder and said softly: -
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after unload from hospital I'm so reduced, quit his job to concentrate in the domestic body, and Wei Wei's girlfriend Yaoyao often come with me, give me good edible, went for a wade with me, I attention about most in absence When they gave me the warmest feeling. Gradually, I gradually came out from the shadows, but I was terrified that I actually have feelings for Wei! Every time he saw Wei and Yaoyao intimate doing in front of me, I envy to decease. Wei is a very careful man, and occasionally peppery soup Yaoyao end of his hand, he rapidly put a hand on the mouth Yaoyao gently kiss, and at that time, I actually want to Wei intensive concern is me is not her . I feel that time is very complicated, crime, spite and a strong impulse driving me mad, meantime I Wei has not minds in mind, in deep remorse on the additional hand, is so good Yaoyao girl, how can I attach to her male. But I can not so I will, I was going outrageous, want to see him every day, but also fearful to see him, his eyes, proboscis, lip, make me a good adore of a good attachment. I actually want to be competent to companion him always, not longer think about others, including Yaoyao. But can not alteration the fact that Wei loved Yaoyao, I in their eyes, equitable a poor woman forsook by others only. However, I did not think that God actually gave me a contingency, but unfortunately the opportunity did not bring me fortune, but to me, and Wei also Yaoyao with advanced abyss further redemption. -
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Yaoyao company sent her to the field study, when we go to get her at the station she tangled nose Wei said: I can not excuse you. On the way back, I silence all the way, feel, and how their happiness than Yaoyao, why is it so unjust to God? Wei asked me how the concern is not uncomfortable, I shook my head. My thoughts at this time, did he could understand. -
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do not know why, between the three fewer Yaoyao, and Wei to get according, I'll always regard themselves as Yaoyao, often senseless attachment showing the look of the Wei, eager to close to him, and I try to exercise restraint their own, very sour, bitter. Wei may also feel out of my strange few days have not come to my house, only to attach to the phone, I attach to yourself. See him, I like to scratch a hundred hearts, feel anxious all day. Can not tell me how to do it, but I really do, in the absence of any reasons, I arranged a dish for a large chart, and then called to tell him that today is my birthday, I hope he can come with me to commemorate . Received a phone call, he was excited, excited did not you tell me how to reproach him, and asked me for gift. I told him that award is not important, at the peak of he came on it. -
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day at noon, Wei Zai Zai holding a very cute bear to me, and then he saw a table full of food, he exclaimed loudly, : : I buy a decanter of malt. . In my eyes closed tight by the time he watched swallowed, and then Ahem cough up. I quickly poured water on him, watching his pain the way I giggled again. Perhaps the reason is because the drinking, I tot let him nectar, he's actually very happy to drink, but he did look out of the alcohol power are numerous, only a few cups of wine, he is not flushed their seats steady. I know the idea I was very mean, I just want to put him drunk, and then what to do, I have not thought about, I just thought he was drunk is to me. -
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he almost barely, and I tried hard to get him to bed, he suddenly embraced me and put me on the oppression in the body, my heart hammering violently up, his body hot, I never even dared to touch, and then I listened the snoring, he actually fell resting on me! I shoved him hard to the side, to help him take off your shoes, and then I looked at him standing bed, and my heart thrown infinite warmth. He rolled over the arm was needled firm shirt, and I carefully for him to help him release the clasps off the shirt, with trembling hands gently stroked his strong muscles, and then I suddenly had to kiss his impulse, so I bent down and kissed his mouth gently, and he did in rejoinder to me! I was shocked, and quickly back, look closely, he was still sleeping, the incipient did not wake up, I was relieved. I'll get a watery towel to help him obliterate her face, and then could not resist snout of his mouth, his eager response to me, my heart raced, and I arrange down beside him tightly around him, stroked him, and he threw his arms into the arms of a sudden hug me, and browse the solutions of my clothes. I did not push any of his playing, are nervous sweating forehead. His sway me enjoy his masculine men Viagra, and then fell comatose lying on the side. I am touched by his sore shoulder got pinch go to the bathroom, just went appearance and heard the living room Wei's phone rang, I picked up a look, is Yaoyao call, I do not hesitate to elect, fingers trembling was not pressed, suddenly a thought surfaced in my mind, I am awaiting access, phone does not ring. So I came out from the toilet, the tel rang, I ran to bring an end to ..., Yaoyao said:
I did not say everything, listening to the bad Yaoyao has asked for a few, -
, I finally said:
muffled I said to her:

I said coldly: Take a deep expiration sitting on the sofa a few of their own, said:
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ten minutes later there was heard a hurried knocking at the door, I have opened the door, standing outside the door I ran into the bedroom Yaoyao a push, I carried arms against the bedroom door cynical look flew her crazy bed desperately tearing the Wei, -
Wei was hard to awake opened his eyes, he was clearly shocked by all this front, antagonism tearing half Yaoyao no response. Yaoyao pumping snapped him a slap in the face, tearful while shouting at him: ! high Jiawei, from now on we go Bridge Road, owned by bridge! I do not know you in this shameless woman, since I walk you through the stack of waste like ~! He is holding the wearer would not let him go, let him angrily punched and hit me. I do not know where the desperate effort to prop him, tearful hysterically shouted: on the ground and held her head to cry buzz. I put my head gently against his back, he suddenly jumped up and gazed at a push I shouted to me: I never want to see you!! -
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few days later, I have no news of them, Wei's phone also has thrown me, I know I finished this entirely, this bet, I lost all my. I went to Wei, the company asked him, to repent, but Wei's colleagues told me that Wei's girlfriend committed suicide, he has resigned to return home was. Pain! Pain so intense I was almost dizzy, I was barely stand leaning on the walls, Oh, I did it, really I did. Many people watched in astonishment, I ornament ornament stagger stagger out of the Wei's company. I despair at home in bed, breathing feel pain. Yaoyao committed suicide, I killed her, I was a average woman, what I face living in this world. My heart is suddenly very quiet, there has been encouraging the idea of ​​me, go die, go die, death can be free, dead to sin. I noiselessly took a bath, put on the most beautiful clothes elaborate make-up, then lying in bed, with a blade and slit open my slender wrist. Then close your eyes and wait for death to take me to sin. Can not remember how long, I woke up, wrist discrepancies in the tangible pain I have very strong desire to survive, I suddenly want to die, and is also not, I go languid to stand up, I go to the hospital! I want to die! I went to their teeth on the road, the sun hot on my body, my eyes a little bit fuzzy, and then to know naught. -
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when I woke up, lying on a hospital bed, I opened my eyes to see, next to a man's face came over, about forty,GHD Precious Gift Set, very intense eyes looked at me: wake up. , I parked at the roadside, you actually fainted in front of my car, and I'll send out, miss what is surely seasoned it, otherwise it will not ... ... the gauze coated around my wrist. I feel in no time dignified, endless pain began to spread, eyes fills tears. He saw me like this, comfort me quickly, so I do not even think about Esen, to support good health talk, I listen to his words close your eyes to sleep, he said he would side with me, let me not be afraid. -
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5 days I was in hospital, he rushed to the hospital every afternoon, to talk with me, give me buy luncheon, tell jokes to me, from his mouth I know thathe is Malaysian, provide in a company in Shenzhen Electronics, that to the airport for customers, the help did not anticipate to happen to me. He will open experienced man, in his comfort, I gradually began to tranquility down the mood, sometimes I will laugh at him. He repeatedly asked why I take things too hard, I did not tell him the truth, just tell him, I can not find the cake and work, loss of reassurance in life. He listened with a laugh, he said to me: Why is he so good to me, but I know thatI am immediately a lonely man and cared for me, after all, is very touching. So I went to the hospital after his company, he sorted for me to work in the Planning Department, I restored the daily busy life, fast-paced, high efficiency, busy work that I gradually forget the nightmarish experience of that phase . Occasionally he would find a great atmosphere at the weekend about my restaurant to eat, then go with me to top stars. Unconsciously in the past few months, my talents are appreciated by the company, I was transferred to the sales department as a manager, even busier and more fulfilling work, and I thought I would go this has been plain, but had not imagined , my life I had once again faced with a misadventure. -
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in bargains manager, I know a lot of customers, there are many good narrations, which have a final name field, especially good to me, often invited me to dinner, my good impression of him, then he told me that he need a group of tubes, but the company creature cash stream difficulties, and asked if I could play the first paragraph after delivery. He said he can give me his villa real possession license as parallel, I believe he is very, so I told him I do not want his real possession copyright, I deem he's people, he must ensure the timely perception of the money to fight over, Otherwise, I'm no good explanation. He was grateful, but to say we should give me real estate license, I believe him, so I put a digit value of the tube more than 30 million cases in the absence of advance payout made out. Field boss's real estate license on his office I did not tell anyone, at the end of the day, it is against company policy. Now think about it, I dare make such determinations without completely psychological mischief, I thought it was from the boss of her, any linkage with the field boss have a good relationship, why it is so striking to send out the merchandise. -
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first few days, often called field boss invited me to dinner thanked the information was not gradual, seeing the end to clear information, and payment has not call me, I am anxious to call overand over again urging him, and every time he got to encounter my submissive, and then I actually stopped the phone call, never had I felt the panic, I quickly rushed to the field to find car company boss said the resident, the result was told this company Bankruptcy has long been disbanded, people are missing. I was on a flaccid deadlock to his legs down to the ground, tears! I phoned the company boss, and he said I heard even ridiculous, then came by car, and I crying to tell him what happened again, a long sigh he said: naive, good things never weighed! too.
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We worked hard to not find the whereabouts of the field boss, seeing the company would remove information, I once again had the idea of ​​death. Boss came to me, he deliberately put a canteen I go to, even whereas the atmosphere is very romantic but I also feel a trace of his very curious today, a meek anti-holiday luxury, he said to me: If retrieval does not come back, you have to bear valid liability, hey, I really want to help you, but no way to start ah. I lowered my brain down cheap
said: big funnel, and I really rue ah.
suddenly he heard a very exciting I said pulling my hand, look at me, said: you, like me, be my woman, so I can truce of mind for you fill out this money.
I was shocked, and quickly concentrate all said:
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He turned and sat down nearby me, his hands holding down my shoulders, dark eyes overflowing tenderness: I am lonely in this very lonesome, I need something to accompany you, leaves, I love you, you promised me, or you can make life complicated for the Hom Yes.
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I bowed his head like a long time, the room deathly calm, I said to myself:
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So I became his lover, living in a big open house, cars, wear priceless clothes to drink good wine. The company that handled the matter by his careful, no one found the company had lost so many money. He was very fine to me back each time to go abroad, gave me with valuable fragrance and gifts, to spoil me as the same baby, I sometimes think he really love me, but I have never a trace of passion, my love, it was already dead. We are in the company retained a good distance, no one knows the special relationship between us, but a home, he looked like a private, willful, childish, it felt as if I'm the big small, I sometimes that, in fact, the days go on it so bad, do not want to go to the pursuit of what, and are not fit to go to chase what it is. Until the advent of Zhao Lei, I found out that I still have feelings. -


It was mid-April, the Ministry of Personnel Liu brought a tall thin boy, said the company was recruited to the sales personnel, so that I receive. Do not know why, I see the first moment he felt like crying, and he did accurate the same with a pair of eyes and Wai, innocence, goodness, I am drooling to take over his resume, Zhao Lei, 25 years age,GHD Straighteners, Nanjing Business School. The next day we fought side by side, Zhao Lei is very gifted, he helped me, I feel more relaxed, and he quickly dry out the extravaganza by the company's awards. To this end, all members of our sales in the motel to give him a gathering to celebrate the day by Jiu Jin Zhao Lei have to ask me to dance,GHD Green Butterfly 2011, the dance layer close to my ear he said: eyes gave me the biggest inspiration, I have the results today, and I thank you. I hope we can go on forever with this.


Since that period, Zhao Lei, work harder, because me also showed amazing concern, will help me buy my preference meal, a lot of work in my period My work took me family break bid. Become versed with, I also know thatsome of his position, he comes from a remote mountainous district, the campus entry exam at family always the money spent, so he should not only feed themselves, but also to aid retired parents at home. I even have a trample on him, reserve him the kind of simple and aboveboard and heartfelt kindness makes me appreciative my life. Every time I have a small cold or something, he strained with something, ran back and busy, but also preposterously coerced me to the hospital, this time I was always touched my heart I feel a little bit of him is near.


Valentine's Day, my lover went back to Malaysia with his wife, for several days I had a terrible mournful, though he called one by one to apologize, today is Valentine's Day, I am doomed to a lonely human also. At midday received a florist sent his pre-Rose, although I was very sour, but still a little comfort, at the end of the day, I have not been forgotten, or at least Valentine's Day roses are also mine. Evening after work, I was going home alone, Zhao Lei stopped me and said to ask me to dinner, boyish eyes looking at me sincerely, I could not refuse, so we went for Valentine's dinner, he light arm around my shoulder, as if we are a pair of intimate lovers. After dinner he sent me home in my room door he gently kissed my forehead moment, then said to me: Please open the door he came in, I poured a cup of tea for him, he looked around my house, said:


Since then, Zhao Lei big turn on my opinion, for if he was my boyfriend, everywhere I care about defending me, I understand, I like him,GHD Benefit Straighteners, like his genuine and good, but also touched by his kindness, the important thing is that I can see in him the shadow of Wei, that I love to complete the boys. But I dare not indulge their love, for I know I'm not eligible, I do not want to hurt my lover's heart, after all, he is really good to me.


Zhao Lei arrest me in the company is an open matter, and many of my colleagues to take our fun, Zhao Lei and do not care, I was very disgusted, once and for all, reached the boss, let him dissatisfied in me. Although I did not love him, but I have no reason to hurt him. Zhao Lei no abatement in chasing my passion, almost to the point of fanaticism, he sent me a rose every day, and he has told colleagues that he had been promised to me even now. I moved the mess, and sometimes really want to love it, love is worth even dead, but think there are a lot of fear. Feelings, I lost too much, no longer afford to lose. I deliberately lest his enthusiasm, wants to fight off his cold, he felt my change, the day off work, he blocked me in the office, he forced me to ask me: I? I let you afraid? I do not understand, you obviously are like me, why can not you accept me? that I not good ample? or my family background good enough for you? you despise me? Do you fear you looking for a mountain baby will be friends joke? merciless kissed me, his big drops of tears fall onto my face flow to my mouth. I gently wiped the tears for him, that moment, my heart melted, I resolved to love him! I'm going to put my feelings to be a break! Freedom of the body such as my resume, I have to carry him, never let him!


my boss is still busy flying lover, I could not find a suitable long talk with him, but I'm feeling and Zhao Lei is leaps and bounds, one would not see him, I want to dead blank . Love's magnetic that so numerous intoxicated. And weekends, Zhao Lei invited me to his place to live, that surprises me with him so I went to the attic, open the gate, my eyes closed mine, and gently led me to room, I opened my eyes, day, full house colored balloons, each balloon is hanging pieces of paper, every scrap of periodical had my appoint, my pleasure to dizziness, gently leaning his weapon years, no longer willing to leave. After banquet we embraced in his sitting room, and he kissed my hair, gently asked me: you are so big, I do not have a girlfriend? not until I met?? love?